I received a letter to myself through the mail. I couldn't believe it.
I have written letters to my sister, uncle, coach, future girlfriend, and my high school self. I'm looking at the letters I have written in this blog. And I haven't written a letter to my sister yet. (I thought I did. A letter to my sister will be one of my future blog entries.)
I looked at the recipient's address on the envelope. And I saw my penmanship. I was in disbelief.
I didn't remember writing a letter to myself. And the return address was never written on the envelope. I thought I was being pranked. I was processing for about a minute. (Picture of envelope shown below.)
My friends and I decided to hit the computer lab during our free period. (It was 2nd period.) They were talking while I was playing around with Microsoft Paint on the PC. We were in our own bubble. Then the bell rang. And they looked at my computer screen for the first time.
I never liked school. I graduated high school in 2005. And I graduated from college in 2017. A huge gap of 12 years. Because I switched majors from Civil Engineering to Environmental Studies. And I never went to see a counselor. I assumed I took the correct classes. I was always a C-average student. Homework was my priority. It saved me from passing. I hated reading and writing at the time.
I can say this or that. But I wouldn't be where or who I'm at right now. I like reading, writing, and blogging.
This is my communication to you. And this blog is too.
"Pleasure is short-term, addictive and selfish. It's taken, not given. It works on dopamine," Seth Godin writes in his blog entry, The pleasure/happiness gap. "Happiness is long-term, additive and generous. It's giving, not taking. It works on serotonin."
My younger-self would be confused with pleasure and happiness. I thought they were related.
Then I was always seeking and wishing for pleasure than happiness. I believed it would fulfill me. And I was aiming to please myself, and especially, others.
I wanted to be known. My desire was to be better than you. My goal was to be the happiest guy in the world. Because I thought it would cure me from everything.
My younger-self wasn't able to resolve any of my problems or mistakes.
I kept dreaming and relying for a pretty wife and cute children, a luxury car, a mansion, and a high-paying job. Because I needed an escape from life. I was waiting for a final destination.
This was pleasure. My younger-self assumed it was happiness.
My happiness is: