The past is remembered.
This blog is my journal. I talk about anything off the top of my head.
I will take you back to my first-ever blog, “Where Am I At Now?” I have changed now. You can say I am a hypocrite.
In that blog post, I wanted to fully pursue my happiness. Now, I have perceived it differently by reading this great book, “kdnndhdjf.”
The great book showed me to keep working on many skills. Then, you can use the many skills to improve your happiness.
Now, my happiness will be on the side as a hobby, like this blog post every Monday nights.
I believe everybody is a hypocrite. People change.
For instance, I say something. Then, I do not completely follow it. I am such a hypocrite.
More examples about hypocrisy.
For instance, I act like I know basketball knowledge. Once I am on the court, it is a different story.
You can dig in more about hypocrisy.
I used to care about receiving "likes" on my Facebook and Instagram. (Perhaps, I have written a previous blog post similar to this. Oh, well. Social media is almost everywhere. I gotta talk about it.)
The more I care about "likes," the more I am confident about myself. (That was me before.) I had the super hunger to post something online.
Now, I try to be my true-self.
Currently, I am in China. I have taken many pictures over here. I am documenting my travel life on my Instagram. I am showing off to you my travel life. I admit it.
I do not mainly focus about gaining followers or receiving likes anymore. I focus on you showing my life (almost like this blog).
Yuh, I still check on the number of likes. My notification is on. I see it. It is tempting. (That is normal. I cannot completely wipe it off my mind.)
Yuh, I filter my photos to make it look crispy (unless my good friend is around, I use her wonderful iPhone X camera). (No need to filter photo using an iPhone X.) I like my photos to look good, before I post them on social media. (Picture shown above.) I admit it.
Yuh, I enjoy posting pictures of myself with the views in the background. (Picture shown above.) I rather post a picture with me in it than only the views. I admit it.
Whenever I receive a few or no likes, I do not get upset on myself anymore.
First and and foremost, I am trying to not only show you the highlight reels of my life. I have my “downs” in life. (For instance, I have posted my meaningful blogs about my sister on my Instagram profile.) It is an up-and-down journey.
Welcome to my “new” insight in social media.
First 10 days, I will be with my friends.
After that, I am on my own traveling and backpacking for 33 days. I have never done this before.
I am scared and excited.
April 3-8: Beijing
April 8-22: Shanghai
(Take a 22-hour slow train ride from Shanghai to Beijing.)
April 23 - May 16: Beijing
The schedule might change. I travel with ease.
Lodging priority in order: Couchsurfing (free stay, and a local host might show you around), Hosteling ($10-15 a night in China), AirBNBing (Cheapest at about $40/night), and Hoteling (Ranges from $50 or more per night).
Most importantly, the food in China is cheap.
I have written many places to visit in Beijing and Shanghai.
Honestly, I am not going to tackle every spot. I do not have a fear of missing out places anymore. It gets exhausting.
Again, I travel with ease.
My new adventure starts now...
The mind is "complex."
It keeps running until I die.
Writing a blog post about it is "incomplete."
Well, here it goes.
Now, I am thinking about writing whatever is at the top of my head.
To this day, I have negative thoughts in my head. They come and go.
Before, the mind would completely take over me.
For instance, if I had a bad day, I would scapegoat. I would use all my anger to everybody else near me. Then, I would completely shut myself down.
Another thought in my mind.
Also, I never trusted my jump shot in basketball. Now, I have confidence in it. Before I would beat myself up, every time I missed a jump shot.
Now, I tell myself, "I am breathing."
If it gets worst, I take 3 deep breaths. Every time my mind is all shaken up on something, I do that. (Find an alternative instead of worrying about the situation.)
Again, the mind has thoughts in my head.
I used to like social media attention, such as growing followers, getting likes, receiving comments, and etc.
Now, it is okay. I enjoy blogging, hiking, and traveling. If I ever get famous, that is a kudos. Most importantly, I enjoy what I do.
I have discovered my true-self.
The mind keeps going (as long as I am able to manage it).
When I go "rock-bottom," the mind is fully tested. Mental-toughness comes in.
Alright, I will end it here. Remember, the mind is "complex."
There is no such thing as "happily ever after."
This is reality, not a movie.
My reality continues on until I die, while a movie always has an ending.
Remember, in reality, life is a balance of sadness and happiness. (That way, I can learn from my mistakes.)
A family friend has heard many funny, interesting stories about me approaching girls.
She told me, "Why come you are still single?" (She believes I can find somebody with ease.)
I answered with a smile, "Life ain't a romantic comedy movie."
A few years ago, I approached a lady in Vegas. Now, she lives in Memphis. To this day, we still remain in contact with each other. We are not dating. We do like each other.
Words about our relationship together: Connect, respect, empathy, honesty, and openness.
Something magical will happen, then. Yuh, this is it.
Not necessarily. Again, life ain't a romantic comedy movie.
(In this situation, my younger-self would say, "This will not work out. Why waste my time contacting a lady far away from me? Just shut her down. I can find somebody else in the Bay Area. I will get hurt."
Now, I tell myself, "It is okay. I am breathing. If I enjoy connecting with her, continue on. Live in the moment. Try not to get my hopes up, such as she is my "one and only." If things do not work out, it is fine. I am breathing. Respect the lady.")
Somehow, I talk to "long-distance" women. It just happens. For instance, I approached a nurse in the Philippines, and I met a lady on an online dating app, Bumble.
(My younger-self would say, "This sucks. Why do I approach women that live far away from me? I hate my life."
Now, I tell myself, "I am breathing. Be aware that I am able to talk to women or anybody, unlike before. Be appreciative.")
Relationships come unexpectedly. (I have said this many times in my old blog posts.) When I am able to connect with anybody, that is powerful.
Welcome to my reality.
I used to always compare myself to others. I always wanted to be better than everybody. I always focused on others more than myself.
I only showed my highlight reels of my life to others. (Now, I have realized life has a balance of happiness and sadness. We have emotions. Life is an up-and-down journey.)
I wanted to be Mr. Popular. I had a huge ego. I kept secrets all to myself. I was concerned about others thinking about me.
I had to be at least better than somebody, or else my life is over. It felt good when I criticized and gossiped somebody.
For instance, if I had a bad day, I looked at any of my friends and family, who have not graduated from college yet. For myself, I graduated with a bachelors of science degree in Environmental Studies.
It felt great whenever I received many social media likes on my most recent post. (That was my number one goal. Many likes was my life.) Something is wrong with me, whenever I received no likes.
That was my "old" happiness.
This is unhealthy. (Too much pressure and energy.)
I was never able to become my true-self.
Now, I focus on myself.
If you are inspired in reading this blog entry or any of my previous ones, I feel very touched.
This is my "new" happiness.
I used to say this all the time with people.
I was such a wannabe know-it-all.
For instance, I gave a lecture to one person. (My lectures were horrible, such as "do not do this," or "do not do that." I was a huge hypocrite. Now, I tell you past stories and experiences from myself, my friends, family, relatives, and etc.) Then, he or she did not listen. He or she followed their own path. Eventually, I was right all along.
I said to him or her, "I told you so..."
I was a huge jerk.
Now, I say, "It is okay. You and I are still breathing. I make mistakes as well."
Nobody is perfect.
We are growing. (Give us time to grow.)
It is up to you. It is your life.
Like my high school PE coach said, "Life is all about choices." Thank you, Coach Marlon Blanton.
Pictures taken from Virginia back in 1992. My family did not take much pictures. This is all I can find of you in the photo albums. Sorry, Uncle.
1st picture is Grandpa Sator (My dad's uncle from his mom's side), me, my sister, and Uncle Romelo.
2nd picture is Grandpa Sator, my dad, me, and Uncle Romelo.
For readers, Uncle Romelo is my dad's youngest brother.
Dear Uncle Romelo,
I enjoyed watching and playing the game of basketball, since I was 9 years old. (It all began in 1996.)
When I was growing up, I was a weird kid. In the late 1990s, I surprisingly rooted for the Utah Jazz over Michael Jordan and his Chicago Bulls. I did not go for the popular team neither the best player in the planet. (After my high school years, I began to understand the game more than before. Then, I finally realized Michael Jordan was an electrifying, amazing basketball player.)
I became a bandwagon. In the early 2000s, I rooted for whichever team was winning, such as the Los Angeles Lakers.
Yes, I was born and raised in the Bay Area most of my life. I still root for the Golden State Warriors.
Most importantly, I love the "game" more than the Golden State Warriors.
(If the Warriors lose, I do not stress out about it anymore. May the best team win. Referees might miss calls, or officiate bad calls. Then again, it is the name of the game. It happens.)
Also, I do watch that much television anymore, except basketball, and some tennis.
I am an NBA super fan, like the known architect man, James Goldstein. He usually wears outlandish outfits with his cowboy hat. (You will see James Goldstein on national televised games on the sideline, while I only watch the games on my iPad on Reddit or TV.)
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