 Last November, I began to declutter my material goods. I sold them through FaceBook Marketplace, or I donated them through Goodwill.
I first learned how to declutter from watching Netflix documentary, Minimalism. And reading Marie Kondo’s book, The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up: The Japanese Art of Decluttering and Organizing. And reading Greg McKeown’s book, Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less. My mind was processing. Simplifying my life and other lives interested me. I challenged myself to understand, apply, and execute it. I started to run a business on junking and hauling. It did take time for me to pursue it. Because I was afraid of failure. I watched Minimalism in 2017. I was astonished by it. During the film, one person talking caught my attention: “The average American household has more than 300,000 items.” I was surprised. But I wasn’t ready to declutter any of my possessions at the time. I backpacked and solo traveled for the first time in 2018. I adjusted and lived their lifestyle. It’s not always about me. There’s more to the world than myself. I visited the Philippines, Spain, and China. I met locals, tourists, travelers, and others. Living an experience is more meaningful and powerful than buying a material good. That’s what I believe. We choose what we spend. I decided to start my own business on June 2019. This business can (possibly) work. America is a consumerism country. You buy and hoard. You are searching for your happiness. I junk and haul it one day for you. My job is to provide service for you. It’s a cycle. You are what keep the junkers/haulers as for myself at work. We are helping each other. Thank you. I expect my business to fail along the way. Running a business is tough, or else everyone would be starting a business right away. We shall see. I tidy your way.  My 4-year-old self with sister in Florida. Taken in August 1991. I think I was upset. I wasn't in the mood for a picture. I need to suffer in order to learn.
I suffered from losing a sister in 2003. She was my best friend. My uncle took her life. I hated him. I wished, prayed, and begged for him to die. (He lost his life in 2008. I still couldn't accept my sister's death at the time.) I learned how to forgive my uncle who lost my sister's life from blogging. It took me 15 years to forgive him. I had a hallucinatory experience from drugs in 2015. (This will be one of my future blog posts.) I suffered from the trip. I regretted it at the time. I learned from the experience. It unleashed my fear and paranoia for the first time. Because my ego would protect me from talking about them. I discovered more about the trip as a meaningful and powerful experience from reading Michael Pollan's book, How to Change Your Mind. The book explained how psychedelic therapy can offer a spiritual experience. The trip was therapeutic. It defined who I was as a person.  Tom Hanks plays Mister Rogers. The movie is about an angry journalist being assigned to interview Mister Rogers. And he has to write an article about him.
I remembered Mister Rogers when I was growing up. But I didn't enjoy watching him. I viewed it as a corny, cheesy show. Because I didn't understand what Mister Rogers was explaining. Before I watched Tom Hanks play Mister Rogers in movie, A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood, I read more about the life of Mister Rogers through Wikipedia. He hosted the preschool TV series, Mister Rogers' Neighborhood, from 1968-2001. Mister Rogers passed away in 2003 due to a stomach cancer. Watching the movie made me understand who Mister Rogers was as a person on and off the camera. He was still himself. Mister Rogers showed empathy and compassion around others. His motive was to service others, especially children, through his kindness. I like this lady. She lives an hour away from me. We matched on Facebook Dating. And we have went on three dates. She's a full time student. And she works full time too. We continue to contact each other.
My feelings are talking now. She won't be able to have any free time to see me for this year. Respect the lady. My younger-self would blame her. I would assume she doesn't like me. And she's not into me. Then I would second-guess on her. Like it would be her way of saying no to me. I would think something is wrong with her or me. My knees haven't given up on me yet.
I play pickup basketball for fun. I still have the speed and quickness. I might have lost one step. Because I'm not getting any younger. I always like going to my left. It's my strong side. Because I'm a lefty in basketball. (I play tennis with my right hand.) My younger-self only relied on my drives and passes. These were my strengths. I never bothered to take a jump shot, even if I were open. Because I wasn't confident. I believed my teammates would hate me. I wanted to impress my teammates with my strengths. I only took jump shots whenever I warmed up.  My sister's ballet class was finished. I grabbed her rose. My 4-year-old self was happy to see her. Photo taken in 1991. I've written 199 blog entries, including this post, since 2016.
I need to continue blogging. It's therapeutic for me. Blogging allows me to be honest and vulnerable. Last blog entry, My Sex Life, might've been the most difficult to read and process. (I just deleted it. I don't need to be 100% open to you.) I wasn't concerned and worried about posting it. Because I'm not seeking any validation and attention to others. "In fact, many people find it extremely difficult to talk about sex; it can be a sensitive and awkward topic that raises feelings fo embarrassment, shame or inadequacy," Matty Silver writes in her article, Why is it so Difficult to Talk about Sex? To come to think about it. I think I was trying to impress you when I released blog entry, My Sex Life.  Passeig de Lluís Companys, Barcelona, Spain. Taken on December 30, 2018. The last time I talked to my tennis and basketball coach was on a Tuesday afternoon on October 30, 2018 at 3PST. It has been one year now. (Time goes by fast. It never stops.) His last missed phone call from me was on Wednesday, October 31 at 7:58pm. (My cousin and I were heading to a brewery. We decided to have him join us.)
Coach was reported dead on Sunday, November 4, 2018. He was found laying on his living room floor. I believe he was gone earlier. The Golden State Warriors have suffered huge losses on their first two games at the start of the NBA season. And it's going to be a long season. I'm used to seeing them play as the juggernaut team for the last 5 years. They've given us 3 rings since 2014. And they have appeared in the NBA Finals for the last 5 years. The Warriors have won 3 out of the 5 years. (That's 60%. That's impressive.)  La Sagrada Familia, Barcelona, Spain. Taken on December 31, 2018. I wrote an old blog entry, Respect the Lady, on June 27, 2017. I decide to write an updated version.
Here are ways I start communicating with a lady:
Then I would receive no word from the lady. Or she would tell me she has a boyfriend, or she's not interested. It gets frustrating and disappointing. But it's understanding. It's good to know I tried at least. I will never know unless I try.   This event is on its 5th year. (It's 10-15 minutes away from home as well. The tickets are cheap ranging from $5-$20.) I was able to see up-and-coming players, like 17-year-old Jack Draper and 18-year-old Brandon Nakashima, and struggling players, like Stevie Johnson, seeking points to move their ranking up.
A friend told me about the 2019 Fairfield Challenger. He told me the attendance has improved every year. I watched alone almost every day except day 1. I would run into meeting at least one person per day, such as a ballboy, a linesman, an old friend, or a stranger. Tom DeLonge used to be in the punk rock/pop band, Blink 182. (My sister introduced me to music when I was growing up. And Blink 182 was one of them.) In 2006, Tom started his own band, Angels and Airwaves.
He named the band in honor of his daughter's name, Ava. I saw DeLonge for the first time live at Bill Graham Civic Auditorium in San Francisco, California on December 7, 2007. The event was Live 105's Not So Silent Night presenting various rock bands: Angels and Airwaves, Jimmy Eat World, Modest Mouse, Paramore, and Spoon. Yesterday, my old friend David from elementary and high school contacted me through FaceBook Messenger. (I yelled and sweared at him in 2006. Anger took over my mind. Then I held a long-time grudge on him. My younger-self started grudges and created enemies at the time. I came at peace with David some time between 2016 and 2017.) I'll be writing a blog entry soon about my friend David. "Angels and Airwaves are in SF tonight," he messaged me. "First live show in years I heard." |
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