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I'm single. And I'm okay with it.
I'm a man seeking a woman. I've been on dates. And I'm for it. (Because I'm still single.) Each woman I've met or approached is different in their own way.  My sister passed away on May 17, 2003. I chose to be alone. Because I was ashamed and embarrassed by others from my uncle losing my sister's life. I did not want to become attached to others. Because I would feel the pain and agony again once they die. I was better off to be alone.
My younger-self wanted others to judge me. I thought I deserved it. I assumed choosing to be alone was weird. For instance, I was frightened to go to high school prom alone since I couldn't ask any girl out. Because of my severe anxiety. And I felt lonely. Because I lost a best friend too. I was isolated from the world. I was a useless person from losing a sister. I had no sense of purpose in life anymore. I had thoughts of committing suicide. But I chose not to do it. Because I didn't want to hurt others more. I hoped and wished I'll die one day. I prayed to God to take my life. I couldn't take it anymore. I wasn't able to accept my sister's death. I posted an old blog entry, The Game is in my Blood, on February 12, 2018. It's about picking up women too. But this is the updated version of it. Because I have grown and evolved from meeting women. I have always been nice to girls throughout my life. But I never expressed my feelings to them right away. They never came to me. My 26-year-old self decided to learn how to pick up women in 2012. Because I felt isolated from the world. And I thought being single was abnormal. "You're not actually connected with yourself," Sasha talks in his 5-minute YouTube video shown below. "You're not in alignment with who you are. You're not clear about what you want. You're just confused and lost. And you’re horny."  I like to spend money in exploring breweries. Taken at Three Mile Brewing, Davis, CA. And behind me is a tennis shop too. Yuh cheers. I need money in order to live and survive.
I was told to study and work hard. And money will come to me. I graduated from Sonoma State University with a BS degree in Environmental Studies. I do not want to pursue it. I have worked multiple part-time jobs throughout my life. I have never experienced working any type of full-time job. My younger-self would be embarrassed and ashamed about it. Because of society. And a full-time job provides benefits. I like to work in an efficient way (to the point where I don't need 40 hours a week). I stay healthy. I'll start investing in my money once I reach a good amount of capital. And benefits from a full-time job won't be needed. I was told to get a girl. You need money. You must impress her. |
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